Sometimes, the person we're desperate to be chosen by isn't just a person we want. They represent something we want to prove. Maybe being with them would make us feel more valuable. More attractive. More important. Maybe our friends would be impressed. Maybe our family would finally approve. Or maybe getting someone like that would finally prove to ourselves that we're worthy. And that's where our ego can quietly start choosing our partners for us... None of this means your attraction isn't real. But it's worth getting curious about what might be driving it. Because the person who makes you feel the most impressive for having them isn't necessarily the person who will make your life the happiest for being in it. Character matters. Values matter. How you feel in their company when there's nobody around to be impressed by them matters. So the next time you find yourself wanting someone desperately, ask yourself: If nobody else ever knew I was dating this person, would I still want them just as much? Because the life you’ll have with someone matters far more than what being with them says about you. If you want to understand the patterns that have been shaping who you choose, so that you can start making choices from a place of peace, this is exactly the work we’ll be doing at my Weekend Retreat this October. Go to MHRetreat.com got all the details.
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