If you’ve ever been in an argument with a toxic person and all of a sudden felt it impossible to “prove” their behavior that has been making you feel small it probably came after they said “Give me an example”. This is a manipulation strategy. They know that isolating one incident makes a pattern easier to discredit. Instead of addressing your larger concern, they will force you to pick one moment then debate the details, derail the conversation, justify their behavior, blame your reaction, or argue that the incident “wasn’t that bad.” Abuse is seen in the continued pattern not in one singular instance.
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